How Real is Your Dream?

“Some people see things that are and ask why? I dream dreams that never was and ask why not?” – George Bernard Shaw

We all have big dreams… of being a great writer, of touching the lives of others in a significant way, of changing the world. But unfortunately, very often these dreams are shrouded by doubts of your own ability, disillusion with the world, unpleasant experiences, negative comments or even derision of others. For many the dream soon dissipates, and with it, the will to shape our destiny.

Yet, have you really thought about what makes one person a billionaire and another a pauper, struggling to make ends meet? Apart from factors, like being born into the right family, given the right opportunities, etc. Think of people like Kim Woo-Choong, founder and chairman of Daewoo Group, who together with four others, started off in a small, drab rented room, but he had a dream bigger than universe itself – to contribute to social development through corporate activity. Says Kim, “Dreams often make the person. They control his personality, his work, even his destiny.”

Or think of bestselling author and highest paid trainer/coach Anthony Robbins. He started off as a janitor, and became a millionaire by the age of 24. Was it not because they, and countless others, dared to dream, and focused on achieving those dreams?

The key word here is focus. Simply dreaming without focusing our attention and effort into realizing those dreams is useless. Says Robbins, “One reason so few of us achieve what we truly want is that we never direct our focus; we never concentrate our power. Most people dabble their way through life, never deciding to master anything in particular. In fact, I believe most people fail in life simply because they major in the minor.”

However, you may ask, how can I even focus when I am not even sure what I really want in life, what are my own strengths and what I am capable of, or how to get to where I want to go? Well, as is often said, clarity is power.

Many people may in fact, be dreaming dreams that do not really belong to them. They claim, “I will be a millionaire in one years’ time!” simply because they think it’s a good dream, or they may have heard their friends or associates enunciating a similar dream.

Just like why so many beauty pageant contestants say, “I want world peace.” But is it really their dream? Is it a fire burning inside? Or simply a concept or ideal that seems like the right thing to say?

That is why I truly believe it is so important to work with a life coach. Someone who can be objective, who can sieve through the many vague hopes and longings that are so unclear, and unfocussed that you never even get started.  Someone to help you finally get to what my mentor, Robert Fritz, bestselling author of Path of Least Resistance, calls your Dynamic Urge, or your intrinsic desires.

Oftentimes people want what they want because of the situation they are in. Not enough money to buy a car, so work longer hours. When the situation is resolved – you have saved enough to buy the car, the effort stops, and soon enough, you find yourself in another similar situation, and you start again. Are you really achieving what you want in life? Are these steps towards a bigger dream, or simply disruptive steps away from what you really want in life?

Says Fritz, the dynamic urge is a genuine phenomenon of the human spirit in which people, no matter what the circumstances, continue to want to create something that matters to them. Let your true desires become the foundation of your life-building process.

Once you have clarity, and focus (and vice versa as focus also brings more clarity), you can indeed open the door to create the life you really want!

Look at for my next article on what is the next thing you need to do once you are clear on what you want to create for yourself.

If you have queries or would like to share your thoughts, write to me at coltacademysg@gmail.com.